in the past few days as i haven’t watched tv, a couple of things have happened.

a.) my room is still really clean (for my room)

b.) i have listened to so much music i’m sick of everything on my computer

c.) i keep thinking of dumb things to write about on here

• usually i don’t actually do it, but here goes!

so i was thinking last night about some of the older computer games i miss. mostly the ones with shoddy graphics and midi music in the background that could be located on a massive floppy disk, or 12 of these disks because you had to change them ALL the time. a few more developed with more impressive images, real music, and maybe even on CD will also be discussed.

my favorite first computer game definitely had to be oregon trail. EVERYONE remembers oregon trail. it was educational AND it kept 8 year olds preoccupied for hours.

i used to try to ford every river to save money and like…half the time i ended up losing all my supplies (and my brother). then someone would die of cholera. and then i would shoot a buffalo for dinner. and i loved this.

around this same time frame, i also remember occasionally playing a game called Mystery House. it’s much less popular,and for obvious reasons. with simple graphics and sound, but a much more confusing interface, this game shied in comparison to oregon trail. additionally, there wasn’t much educational value here.

i never could seem to get out of the first few steps, and honestly, i’m not sure i ever found out what the “mystery” actually was..

i just walked around typing random prompts like “go door” or “look table” or “steal lamp” (the last one never seemed to work, not sure why they didn’t program that one in there, clearly appropriate)

i vaguely remember dead people involved, and being slightly terrified of entering certain rooms, which may have been why i never moved past a certain point in the game….

another oldie but goody was Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego. you’re probably singing that song in your head now..i know i am. i used to love that tv show. it was on PBS (great television viewing), but the creators went one step further and decided a computer game would be great for the kids.

still pretty simple and played on those first bulky apple machines, this game was a bit more flashy but still educational! basically in this game you play a detective who is trying to catch a criminal and retrieve some priceless treasure which has turned up missing. you follow clues and interview witnesses and chase this thief around the world. the criminals had names like Dazzle Annie Nonker and Ihor Ihorovitch, and you had to catch them to ultimately get to carmen. and along the way you had to answer questions and write down clues.

it wasn’t a bad game, and there were like 30 cities and a million people to meet so it had a lot more to offer than the previous two games, i think. i really learned my geography.

so at some point right around third grade we traded our apple for a real pc. it was pretty top of the line at the time. had windows. we dialed up to prodigy net in texas (resulting in masssssive phone bills and 1-hour-a-week time limits for each kid) and soon i was chatting it up with random strangers in chat rooms called “kids 9-12″ and “girls under 13 only”

as it turns out it wasn’t just girls under 13. there apparently weren’t that many girls under 13 on the internet anyway.

okay, back to the games. in the 90s it just got better. it’s like all the sudden the programmers just crossed this major hump and created some amazing games with very crisp clear graphics. or maybe it was just because we tossed that bulky gray machine for something a little more sleek that had a cd drive. always a plus. and no more of those crazy floppy disks. we switched to the smaller hard ones. which always seemed to have an error (probably because i had a bad habit of sliding the little metal door back and forth out of boredom), but anyway…

the first game we really bought was myst. ahhhhh myst. i spent so many hours playing that silly game. and honestly i never beat it. i was like…10. it was apparently above me.

okay, myst had great graphics and sound effects. you’d be walking along the shore and you could hear the sound of the water lapping against the land and birds in the distance and some eerie, but calming music was also present. the one thing it was missing was people. i guess that was the point of the game though. it was just sort of weird walking around this peaceful world void of people. very lonely and unsettling.

you had to solve puzzles to get to different “ages” to ultimately solve the mystery (which i mentioned i never solved…)

one thing that was nice about it was that you never died. you couldn’t die. you couldn’t jump off a ledge or get shot or run out of food. you just didn’t die. you could lose, but no fear, you will not die. i like that feature in a game because for some reason as a child dying in a game really terrified me. i really didn’t want my character to die. i’m a little more accustomed to death now as the majority of computer games seems to be shoot-uhm-up games and we do see quite a lot of it on tv (did you see the kid that got eaten by a Siberian tiger in california??!). my parents kept me pretty sheltered those days, though.

so myst…i just walked around. and sometimes i solved some puzzles, usually not. i sat in the dentist chair. i’m pretty sure it was never a dentist chair, that’s just really what it looked like to me and what i’m now associating with it. i traveled up the tree to get to the channelwood age (i think). but i never won. the brothers are bogus, by the way. if you do get to the end don’t give either of them the final page.

 

another one that was big–civilization. i, however, never experienced the joys of civilization, and skipped straight to 2. i appreciated this game a lot. strategy is a lot of fun. controlling little lives. people love that stuff. you couldn’t consult the high council in the first, anyway, and that’s a pretty important feature. they’re great until they get into an argument and ultimately declare anarchy. it’s never good.

unlike some of the other games i played back in the day, i was actually able to beat this one. that’s right, i got my spaceship to alpha centauri. it’s okay to be jealous.

i didn’t much like going to war with the other civilizations, though i realize it was a necessary evil since we were all vying for the same land. i am a pretty peaceful world leader. a “lion-hearted” world leader, i might add.

 

okay, one more. though there are a million to choose from. i was quite the little computer game junkie once upon a time.

so, while i did enjoy every sim game that was ever created (and i must admit, from time to time i still play the Sims 2, this is not something i am proud of, but don’t knock it til you try it!), the first one that i ever got to play was simtown. shortly after i discovered simcity, but i definitely enjoyed simtown more. it was geared at kids (which i was–a happy little tech savvy 4th grader). i loved how i could name the people walking around and look into their houses, a feature which does not exist in simcity. all you could see was a faroff view of some apartment buildings which ALWAYS turned into dumps because i always forgot to get pipes going to the place so no one ever wanted to live there.

simtown was less complicated. and it was happy. theburger joint was shaped like a burger. the pizza place had a large pizza slapped on the front, and the library was a row of *shocker* large books. nothing difficult to figure out there…

and, what would a game be without a few good easter eggs. a nifty little thing, if there was a pig on the screen and you typed bacon, it would fly away. need to get rid of those trailer homes? just type toast and they’re gone.

they must have had a thing for breakfast food.

so there you have it. a perfectly good waste of my sunday afternoon. time to hit the gym. maybe i’ll come back and download simtown because after writing about it i kind of miss it a lot.

well, have a good day and a happy new year. resolutions will follow shortly.

-jessica

Maybe it’s the ticket talking,
If you notice anything out of the dirty windows.
Maybe you’ll have a good time,
Maybe you’ll have a great time.
Falling asleep on the shoulder of a stranger,
I don’t know where you’re going.

snailhouse ~ have a good time

lately i’ve been feeling really lame as a result of heavy media consumption. particularly my television. i just turn it on for noise and then evenings escape me. and i’m lamer than the day before.

so.

as of tonight at about 7:30 pm, i have decided to unplug it.

this will continue for at least a week. i’m having some pretty serious withdrawals currently, but i think it’s better this way. my background noise is now some sweet tunes.

the glare on the screen won’t bother me now.

the hardest part was the pure silence that occurred as i settled in to a completely dead quiet empty apartment before i could get the laptop booted up.

i actually heard my neighbors (usually they hear me–they probably hate my guitar)

so that is my challenge. i feel i can succeed. perhaps if the next week serves me well i will continue. the hardest part is the first week, i hear.

the cold sweats will go away soon.

good thing the office isn’t showing new episodes. i would never make it.

i’ll keep you updated.

i cleaned my room today. for no apparent reason, other than to feel more comfortable in the place where i live. i tried to move the things that have just been sitting, like the box from my laptop and the pictures of trees that i purchased from old time pottery 2 months ago sitting in the corner. they look much better on my wall.

i feel like i have all these loose ends floating around. in my apartment. in my friendships. in my job. just floating about. they aren’t really bad loose ends…they just leave an unsettled feeling, making it difficult for anything to feel complete.

i realize it’s impossible to tie up every end, but it’s nice to try. it’s nice to see the floor in my closet. it’s nice to push the dust off some of things that i’ve been neglecting, too.

i’m not organized. i think i’d like to be. not TOO organized, though. i need lots of room for creativity. it doesn’t seem to occur that much in the confines of very particular organization.

breathing room.

too much clutter and too much disorganization though, that can kill you. it can stifle everything that could potentially be great. so many things to think about that none of them get enough attention to flourish. great ideas die and nothing succeeds.

happy medium, i hope for.

there’s a pile of empty orange tic tacs next to my tv. that’s another addiction of mine. my parents felt the need to break my dry streak and purchase quite a few very large boxes to stuff in my stocking. which i ate rather quickly. so quickly that some didn’t even make it in my mouth, i guess. i keep finding stray tic tacs around the apartment. megan too.

last night at the pet store i wanted to pet a ferret. the are tricky and fast. as i was petting one and conversing, the little furry beast flipped his head back and attempted to eat me ( i think)

however, i quickly pulled my hand back

straight into the overhang over the tank. and now the knuckle over my left index finger hurts considerably a lot.

i probably should have just let him bite me.

in an attempt to be optimistic, i feel i should mention that the sun is setting about a minute later each day. we’re on the way out of these awful dark short days. more light = more happiness. i cannot wait for the longest days. the warm ones when you can swim at night without shivering. shorts and flipflops. and maybe tents. i think i want more tents this year. please camp with me.

and boating and fishing and rollerblading.

ahhhh summer i miss you.

but we’re getting there, slowly.

i figure once the holidays are over the winter is pretty much worthless. we should probably skip jan and feb. march can stay. for now.

-jessica

At the edge of the rest of your life
At the end of a one way road
I was losing everything
And tonight may never shine
If you never open your eyes
I keep this heart right next to mine

the anniversary ~ the siren sings

so i’m officially back. actually i was back saturday morning at 8 am. which is really awful, by the way. my sleep schedule is a joke right now. today i got up at 2 pm. after going to sleep at 5 am. on the up side, i spent last night with friends celebrating the holidays, watching Christmas movies, and just overall having a good time.

the drive home was brutal. ross drove straight through, which is impressive, i must say. i, however, felt the need to stay up for the entire 20 hours. this is never a good idea.

the drive home is never as fun as the drive there.

but, let’s see, i should talk about the trip. perhaps provide you with some good photos, maybe a video or 2. well, the trip was pretty awesome. colorado is a very nifty state. illinois doesn’t really compare. i’m pretty sure illinois wouldn’t hold up to almost any of the other states. except probably kansas, though. as i stated before, kansas is worthless. this fact was only reinforced on the long drive home.

so on tuesday i was doing really well with the whole snowboarding thing, gaining lots of confidence, much more impressive than day 1. then as i was trying to turn my board from heel side to toe side i fell backwards down the hill on my poor tail bone. which now hates me. it was a very painful experience which sent me home early on tuesday and completely killed wednesday.

but i wasn’t going to let it take me out for the whole week. i spent nearly all of thursday on the slopes (the green ones.) rocking out.

i’m not bad. i think this is something i will do again. i don’t know when, but it will certainly have to happen at some point. preferably before i get really old and am susceptible to broken bones as a result of low calcium intake from the age of 20 on.

i really don’t want to get old.

so speaking of old. i saw old man penis. against my will. we did something amazing on tuesday night. we went to the hot springs not far from our condo. i must say, the walk from the hole in the rock to the springs in a swimsuit was insanely insanely cold. but it would have been even colder if we had been naked–like many of the old men there.

now i’m not sure what provokes someone to let it just hang around out there in the freezing cold like that, but many old men found this to be a perfectly acceptable option. perhaps there was a feeling of freedom. or maybe they just like the exposure. not sure. but as i was sitting on the rock steps in the 100 degree water surrounded by pine trees, piles of snow, and rising steam, i was lucky enough to get a close view of one of the organs responsible for the X rating that should be placed on the location.

just flew right by my face. he could have put a warning out there for those of us who prefer to just close our eyes, but nothing, no warning, just a small bit of twig and berries, dangerously close to my head. he was bald, too, just for the sake of your imagination–just in case you were picturing some young hunk. i would never want to lead you astray in your fantasy. he was quite old.

but the hot springs experience, aside from that unfortunate event, was quite amazing. it’s so incredibly crazy that these wonderfully warm hot tubs just happen in the middle of a freezing cold mountain. it was probably one of the most relaxing things i’ve ever done. also, you could just reach over the rock wall to find a freezing cold river. just hanging out. right there next to the hotness. being all freezing cold. and some crazies chose to jump this wall and get a cold burst of, i think 45 degrees, then quickly return to the 100 degrees plus. this cannot be good for your body, but i guess it’s one way to get a rush. i won’t lie, i considered it, but as i put my paws in the water and realized just how cold it really was, i wimped out.

i’m just not that cool.

after 2 hours of wonderfulness, i somehow managed to get out of my suit and back into winter clothes without exposing myself, we headed back. just in the walk up the hill my hair froze. what a neat feeling. but my insides were still so warm from sitting slow-cooking for 2 hours. what fun! i loved it.

i should also talk about another first i experienced in colorado.
so far in my life, there has been a lot of talk about sushi, but never have i actually partaken in this dining spectacular. i wasn’t even sure what to expect.

before we go on, i feel we should review my eating habits…i rarely eat:

• any fish aside from tuna
• cow in any form
• things with weird texture…

i think i just knocked out every type of sushi, right there.

i was aware of this going into sushi, but i do like to try new things. i’m not opposed to giving it a whirl, i just had a bad feeling.

i snacked a bit before we left, having a strong feeling that i may not leave with a full tummy. i guess it wasn’t as bad as you might have guessed. i actually liked the first piece i ate. i someone convinced myself that it wasn’t actually eel rolled in rice with fish eggs on top. actually, they told me the orange was carrot—it wasn’t. the spicy tuna rolls, not my thing, too spicy.

the egg rolls–whatever they were called, these were good. i probably found them so delicious because they actually fit within the confines of my sharply defined preferred food categories.

the worst was the rainbow roll. i’m not sure what i was thinking. i could see the slices of pink fish packed in against the rice and the eel hanging out inside. my stomach rolled over as soon as i placed it on my tongue .

i do think i can/will eat sushi again, but i have complied a list of a few rules that might be used to guide me in a more appropriate direction, given my recent experience.

lesson one: don’t eat it if the fish is outside of the roll.

lesson two: spicy is probably not a good idea.

lesson three: purple haze? no thanks.

lesson four: strawberries and fish, not an acceptable union.

it wasn’t that bad, but probably not a new favorite of mine.

we did get a chance to go out once or twice, mostly to a local bar called the Tugboat. there were encountered the girl with the most annoying laugh in colorado. right there, just hiding out in the small bar!

i wonder if she knows she’s famous…

we also made friends with our bartender and listened to a pretty decent jam band. we could have seen them twice but i am a weeny and have difficulties staying up past 10pm.

once was enough, though, i guess.

so here’s another funny little story for you, because that’s why you read this, for the funny little stories.

upon leaving for colorado last weekend, ross informed me that we didn’t have any window shield fluid. this is never good in the snowy weather, but someone we didn’t think to put more in there.

it was passable until the drive home where the muddy window suddenly became unbearable and treacherous. as we’re soaring down an icy mountain road it quickly becomes apparent that visibility, as a result of a dirty window shield, is nearly nonexistent.

there are no exits for us to take and purchase fluid. so i, being the queen of creative ideas that create large messes, but usually eliminate the problem (that is my exact title, mind you), quickly made the decision to sacrifice my diet pepsi from A&W (not the barbecue place, though).

at 50 miles an hour, in a tunnel beneath a mountain, i reached my arm out the window into freezing cold and tossed a diet soda on the window.

totally worked. except my arm was covered in soda. and so was the right side of the car. and the soda later froze on the corners of the window. and i no longer had a soda (which judging by the frequency of my bathroom breaks is a bad idea anyway)

however, the weather quickly won again and we were forced to spare another beverage. this time it was not diet, and therefore quite sticky. this one made an even larger mess and i somehow lost my touch and threw the bulk of it back into the car. whatever, we could see again.

then we finally get to a gas station. it’s freezing, it’s snowy, and it’s blowing all about, but ross braves the conditions and fills up that fluid tank…..wait…it’s full already….

how can this be? ross explains to me that it must be broken. oh no! what a disaster!

wait, let me try–oh it seems to be working, ross what have you been doing? oh that button with the window? what about that button right next to it with a window and what appears to be two sprays of liquid shooting on it??

for a very smart guy, ross has some moments.

so much easier just to use the window shield wiper fluid. and we didn’t have to waste anymore soda..!

i could tell a million more stories, but typing takes forever, so perhaps when we encounter each other in person, we can laugh about these and i can tell many more. or not, but i like telling stories, so maybe you humor me? maybe i’ll humor you.

merry christmas to you, by the way. and happy new years.

it’s almost 2008. i hope to make it a great year. i hope you are a part of it.

-jessica

And if you want it to be real, come over for a night, we can really, really climb
and those blue bridge lights might really burn most bright while we watch that dark lake rise.
And if you really want to see what really matters most to me, we can just take a real short drive.

okkervil river ~ for real

10am

we’re almost to colorado now, finishing up the final leg of kansas. Kansas is really long, and really boring, by the way. The weather has been a huge pain in the butt so far on this journey.

Last night upon leaving we could really only drive 35 mph at most. Very dangerous stuffs. After we got out of the stl area though, it slowed up and we could drive the speed limit. I actually haven’t driven at all yet, I was planning on taking part of Kansas but about halfway through we realized just how bad they had gotten it. Everything is just coated with a sheet of ice and most of the interstate is slippery. I don’t really want to drive in that and since I drive like an old woman in bad weather, i’m pretty sure no one else wants me to drive either.

 

So the other guy in the car, chad, he got a ticket this morning. Clocked at 91. probably going faster.. I must admit I feared for my life at multiple points in time, but so far we’re surviving.

The biggest issue so far was the lack of open gas stations when I felt I might explode. Finnnnnally, and oddly enough, at bunker hill, kansas, we found an open conoco. Thank goodness for trust stops.

 

I made friends with some girls in the bathroom. They are also on their way to colorado, but their drive is something like 6 hours total. They don’t even KNOW. 18 hours in the car—too much.

They are actually headed to Colorado Springs though. Our destination is Steamboat Springs. I have no idea where this is located on a map, and i’m really just taking the guys word for it that we’re going the right way.

 

I’m pretty sure this is why I bought a laptop by the way. Just so I could type and ride. AND listen to this greatness. I’m not carsick…..yet. But it’s been like an hour since I flipped this thing on and so far, I’m feeling alright. This is good news.

 

It’s pretty baron around here. Just some flat lands, farms, and lots of ice and snow. We attempted to stop at a gas station earlier (which was closed) and found some super sweet ice weeds. I think i’ll post a picture so you can see what I mean. But they were pretty nifty.

 

This morning I woke up after a short nap and it was just before sunrise over Kansas. It was very pretty. The skies are really clear and blue today. Thank goodness the storm is over. It was just really beautiful though, hills, and grass poking through snow dusted hills, the sun hitting everything from just behind the skyline. I liked it.

 

The rest of Kansas, though, very lame.

 

Last night we had a Hutson family gathering at Bunker Hill, IL. It’s always nice to see the family, get a few presents, and eat delicious food. Sadly, I was late. I got off work late yesterday and then couldn’t find any long underwear anywhere (it is apparently an essential item). Once I packed and my 35 minute drive turned into an hour and a half, I practically missed the whole thing.

However, my family loves me and they hid away some cheesy potatoes before they got eaten up. I’m not sure who makes those, but I think they should take a hint from the last 20 some years of celebrations where they disappear within 20 minutes and just make double portions :)

 

So it’s gonna be really great not to work next week. We have just been so busy as a result of conversion. It’s getting better though, and after a week away I should be superb.

We had an area christmas party on friday. That was a pretty good time. Free food and drinks and karaoke. I did a little dancing too, of course.

 

I really want to get there and take a shower. I feel pretty gross and I really want to lay down in a bed. This back seat, not all that comfortable.

Did I mention I only know one person on this entire trip?? Hopefully I’ll make friends quickly though….once I get some sleep I’ll be extroverted again and much less irritable.

 

9:30pm

 

we’ve been here since about 6pm. The drive was ohhh so long, 16 hours straight through. But the tail end of it was beaaautiful. We saw a sunset over mountains. So today, I saw a sunrise AND a sunset. And I only got about 2-3 hours of sleep. So at 930 I have every intention of putting myself to bed.

Tomorrow we’re on the slopes early, by 8 am I hear! Hopefully I won’t fall TOO much.

 

-jess

 

I roll the window down
And then begin to breathe in
The darkest country road
And the strong scent of evergreen

death cab ~ passenger seat

 

so i leave for colorado on saturday night–i have much to do before then, and i haven’t exactly started the christmas shopping yet…

bad news.

tomorrow is my office christmas party, i’m pretty excited for it

i do love parties.

there will be karaoke and food and probably a lot of drunk co-workers. i typically enjoy such a show!

2 more days of work. 2 more days of awfulness. i should mention, we recently “upgraded” to a new computer system. i’m not sure how they can call something so inefficient an upgrade though. it’s really really awful, but week 1 is almost complete, and then i have a week off!

let’s pray i don’t break my leg

or arm

or die.

i’m just hoping for a really enjoyable, relaxing week. then christmas. then new years.

and this year i’m going to keep my resolutions, i think i hope.

i really would like to purchase a new guitar. i just haven’t found the right thing yet. unfortunately for me, takamine no longer makes the guitar (DREAM guitar) pictured below. i want it. yet it just isn’t possible.

i’m missing a great show tonight at the stagger inn in edwardsville. it doesn’t start until 9 though, and in my old age, i find that i can’t seem to stay awake too late, and then if i do….i’m an irritable little financial services specialist. never good.

http://www.myspace.com/superfunyeahyeahrocketship
http://www.myspace.com/kentuckyknifefight
http://www.myspace.com/jinriksha

tuesday night i attended my first blues game, we had box seats. it was nifty. not nearly as cool as the luxury box at the rams game, but still fun.

i went with my friend Keith and his co-workers. keith uses me as a back-up girlfriend when he primary girlfriend is not available. i think i’m okay with that…

i have some new songs. i hope i can play them soon for an audience. i think i’m getting better as performing. i just need more practice. so if you ever want to be an audience…..

i wish the office would feature some new episodes. i’m not a fan of this writer’s strike. i really need the office.

everything should end in a question mark.

and everyone should listen and pretend to know what they are talking about when they scramble for an explanation.

sometimes people are just looking to legitimize a concern. maybe it’s not a big concern–just something to worry about–to pass the time.

so you can either pretend you understand, or you can tell them they need professional help–but i doubt that’s what they were expecting to hear..

oh, and i’m officially a notary public now. so if you need anything notarized. just come see me. i’m that awesome.

i really enjoy the weakerthans. i really really do.

-jess

You are a radio. You are an open door.
I am a faulty string of blue christmas lights.
You swim through frequencies.
You let that stranger in, as I’m blinking off and on and off again.
We’ve got a lot of time.
Or maybe we don’t, but I’d like to think so, so let me pretend.

the weakerthans ~ my favorite chords