so i’m officially back. actually i was back saturday morning at 8 am. which is really awful, by the way. my sleep schedule is a joke right now. today i got up at 2 pm. after going to sleep at 5 am. on the up side, i spent last night with friends celebrating the holidays, watching Christmas movies, and just overall having a good time.

the drive home was brutal. ross drove straight through, which is impressive, i must say. i, however, felt the need to stay up for the entire 20 hours. this is never a good idea.

the drive home is never as fun as the drive there.

but, let’s see, i should talk about the trip. perhaps provide you with some good photos, maybe a video or 2. well, the trip was pretty awesome. colorado is a very nifty state. illinois doesn’t really compare. i’m pretty sure illinois wouldn’t hold up to almost any of the other states. except probably kansas, though. as i stated before, kansas is worthless. this fact was only reinforced on the long drive home.

so on tuesday i was doing really well with the whole snowboarding thing, gaining lots of confidence, much more impressive than day 1. then as i was trying to turn my board from heel side to toe side i fell backwards down the hill on my poor tail bone. which now hates me. it was a very painful experience which sent me home early on tuesday and completely killed wednesday.

but i wasn’t going to let it take me out for the whole week. i spent nearly all of thursday on the slopes (the green ones.) rocking out.

i’m not bad. i think this is something i will do again. i don’t know when, but it will certainly have to happen at some point. preferably before i get really old and am susceptible to broken bones as a result of low calcium intake from the age of 20 on.

i really don’t want to get old.

so speaking of old. i saw old man penis. against my will. we did something amazing on tuesday night. we went to the hot springs not far from our condo. i must say, the walk from the hole in the rock to the springs in a swimsuit was insanely insanely cold. but it would have been even colder if we had been naked–like many of the old men there.

now i’m not sure what provokes someone to let it just hang around out there in the freezing cold like that, but many old men found this to be a perfectly acceptable option. perhaps there was a feeling of freedom. or maybe they just like the exposure. not sure. but as i was sitting on the rock steps in the 100 degree water surrounded by pine trees, piles of snow, and rising steam, i was lucky enough to get a close view of one of the organs responsible for the X rating that should be placed on the location.

just flew right by my face. he could have put a warning out there for those of us who prefer to just close our eyes, but nothing, no warning, just a small bit of twig and berries, dangerously close to my head. he was bald, too, just for the sake of your imagination–just in case you were picturing some young hunk. i would never want to lead you astray in your fantasy. he was quite old.

but the hot springs experience, aside from that unfortunate event, was quite amazing. it’s so incredibly crazy that these wonderfully warm hot tubs just happen in the middle of a freezing cold mountain. it was probably one of the most relaxing things i’ve ever done. also, you could just reach over the rock wall to find a freezing cold river. just hanging out. right there next to the hotness. being all freezing cold. and some crazies chose to jump this wall and get a cold burst of, i think 45 degrees, then quickly return to the 100 degrees plus. this cannot be good for your body, but i guess it’s one way to get a rush. i won’t lie, i considered it, but as i put my paws in the water and realized just how cold it really was, i wimped out.

i’m just not that cool.

after 2 hours of wonderfulness, i somehow managed to get out of my suit and back into winter clothes without exposing myself, we headed back. just in the walk up the hill my hair froze. what a neat feeling. but my insides were still so warm from sitting slow-cooking for 2 hours. what fun! i loved it.

i should also talk about another first i experienced in colorado.
so far in my life, there has been a lot of talk about sushi, but never have i actually partaken in this dining spectacular. i wasn’t even sure what to expect.

before we go on, i feel we should review my eating habits…i rarely eat:

• any fish aside from tuna
• cow in any form
• things with weird texture…

i think i just knocked out every type of sushi, right there.

i was aware of this going into sushi, but i do like to try new things. i’m not opposed to giving it a whirl, i just had a bad feeling.

i snacked a bit before we left, having a strong feeling that i may not leave with a full tummy. i guess it wasn’t as bad as you might have guessed. i actually liked the first piece i ate. i someone convinced myself that it wasn’t actually eel rolled in rice with fish eggs on top. actually, they told me the orange was carrot—it wasn’t. the spicy tuna rolls, not my thing, too spicy.

the egg rolls–whatever they were called, these were good. i probably found them so delicious because they actually fit within the confines of my sharply defined preferred food categories.

the worst was the rainbow roll. i’m not sure what i was thinking. i could see the slices of pink fish packed in against the rice and the eel hanging out inside. my stomach rolled over as soon as i placed it on my tongue .

i do think i can/will eat sushi again, but i have complied a list of a few rules that might be used to guide me in a more appropriate direction, given my recent experience.

lesson one: don’t eat it if the fish is outside of the roll.

lesson two: spicy is probably not a good idea.

lesson three: purple haze? no thanks.

lesson four: strawberries and fish, not an acceptable union.

it wasn’t that bad, but probably not a new favorite of mine.

we did get a chance to go out once or twice, mostly to a local bar called the Tugboat. there were encountered the girl with the most annoying laugh in colorado. right there, just hiding out in the small bar!

i wonder if she knows she’s famous…

we also made friends with our bartender and listened to a pretty decent jam band. we could have seen them twice but i am a weeny and have difficulties staying up past 10pm.

once was enough, though, i guess.

so here’s another funny little story for you, because that’s why you read this, for the funny little stories.

upon leaving for colorado last weekend, ross informed me that we didn’t have any window shield fluid. this is never good in the snowy weather, but someone we didn’t think to put more in there.

it was passable until the drive home where the muddy window suddenly became unbearable and treacherous. as we’re soaring down an icy mountain road it quickly becomes apparent that visibility, as a result of a dirty window shield, is nearly nonexistent.

there are no exits for us to take and purchase fluid. so i, being the queen of creative ideas that create large messes, but usually eliminate the problem (that is my exact title, mind you), quickly made the decision to sacrifice my diet pepsi from A&W (not the barbecue place, though).

at 50 miles an hour, in a tunnel beneath a mountain, i reached my arm out the window into freezing cold and tossed a diet soda on the window.

totally worked. except my arm was covered in soda. and so was the right side of the car. and the soda later froze on the corners of the window. and i no longer had a soda (which judging by the frequency of my bathroom breaks is a bad idea anyway)

however, the weather quickly won again and we were forced to spare another beverage. this time it was not diet, and therefore quite sticky. this one made an even larger mess and i somehow lost my touch and threw the bulk of it back into the car. whatever, we could see again.

then we finally get to a gas station. it’s freezing, it’s snowy, and it’s blowing all about, but ross braves the conditions and fills up that fluid tank…..wait…it’s full already….

how can this be? ross explains to me that it must be broken. oh no! what a disaster!

wait, let me try–oh it seems to be working, ross what have you been doing? oh that button with the window? what about that button right next to it with a window and what appears to be two sprays of liquid shooting on it??

for a very smart guy, ross has some moments.

so much easier just to use the window shield wiper fluid. and we didn’t have to waste anymore soda..!

i could tell a million more stories, but typing takes forever, so perhaps when we encounter each other in person, we can laugh about these and i can tell many more. or not, but i like telling stories, so maybe you humor me? maybe i’ll humor you.

merry christmas to you, by the way. and happy new years.

it’s almost 2008. i hope to make it a great year. i hope you are a part of it.

-jessica

And if you want it to be real, come over for a night, we can really, really climb
and those blue bridge lights might really burn most bright while we watch that dark lake rise.
And if you really want to see what really matters most to me, we can just take a real short drive.

okkervil river ~ for real